do you ?

cut short ;

hey,

its been a long time since i did blog .. and im starting to lose the blogging spirit .. but there are some things i have yet to let out .. there's just too much to say. so i'd be pretty random with this... first of all , the nights seems much lonelier without you .. everynight , im alone , i've got no one to talk to , no one used to care as much as you did .. constant lectures and nags are starting to crush my spirit .. its like my parents have some thing against me or something .. why am i never good enough ? there are time's i sit by the phone , and in the pure silence of solitude , i could still remember your giggle .. but now , im just , me .. life seem pretty miserable .. giving up on everything i've know .. and why is everybody going away ? though there are times i have fun , but fun is only mommentary .. i smlie , cause everybody smiles .. everybody seem to have their perfect world , while me , im living in my perfect dream of a world .. everything i do , seems to have weighed me more .. and sleep gets less and less , my eyes would only close , but the sleep just wont fall deep .. morning showers cold like ice , the way i like it , to open up my eyes .. i tried to voice out once , then i tried again , but im not heard .. even my parents wont listen .. they just seem to have so much fun going at each other .. but the best part is , my closest friend seems to be my computer .. when i type , the words comes out , when i click it does exactly .. if only life was operated this way .. and sometimes , i might be trying too hard , forgive me , im just trying to find company .. Karma has its ways and im its victim .. its been fun having it around , now i want to live my own ..

hear me out '

giving up is an option,

it lets you start a-new..

im no prepared ;

you caught me so off guard .. im confused , but still , i stand strong in front of you , despite the pain in me .. times when i tried so hard to prove you wrong , you'd believe the unproven .. whats that ? what am i doing wrong ? though it might just be me from now , i wanna let you know , i had fallen for you .. but , i dont expect you to do the same . im running from here , to somewhere im less vulnerable ..

compromise the pain,

and you'd find joy ?

you dont have to be nice to me , if you think im that bad

i'll treat you no different